"Better to keep silent and be thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt" (attributed to Mark Twain)
One of my favorite quotes, that is. And so true. Oh, is it true!
Oftentimes, we meet quiet people and think them as smart. But after getting to know them a bit, and hearing them speak, we realize that our first impressions were false.
And yet, this quote is dangerous.
Yes, "Siyag Lichochmah Shtikah" - the road to wisdom is through keeping silent - but there's also "Loh Habayshan Lomed" - one who is embarrassed to ask will not learn.
"Lakol Zman VaEis Tachas Hashamayim". There is a time and place for everything. A time for silence, and a time for speaking up.
Iyov kept silent, and suffered for it.
Yisro spoke up, and though at first he had to run away, his son-in-law became Moshe Rabbeinu.
We must teach the children of today to ask. To question. To want to know. To thirst for knowledge. To not be afraid to ask a question out of fear that it may sound foolish. Yiddishkeit is about asking, about questioning, about wanting to know.
And also about keeping silent and listening when it's the right time to do so.
15 comments:
We must teach the children of today to ask. To question. To want to know. To thirst for knowledge. To not be afraid to ask a question out of fear that it may sound foolish. Yiddishkeit is about asking, about questioning, about wanting to know.
And also about keeping silent and listening when it's the right time to do so.
I agree with you. I think one of the greatest dangers to this generation is that many teachers do not know enough themselves to field their students' questions, so they just tell them that it's assur to ask about [fill in the blank] and they must be kofrim to even think about it and now let's get on with the lesson plan, girls. It's a very dangerous mistake they're making, when they shut down inquisitive minds and label them the troublemakers when they're really just looking for answers.
Very well put.
Great post...
nuff said
.
Actually, your opening quote is attributed to Abraham Lincoln first, I believe.
Your point is good, though.
However, I believe that people generally know where that line applies to them. Asking questions is not the same kind of speech as, say, acting like an authority on something you know nothing about. In the other examples you gave of those who remained silent when something needed to be said, it seems to me to be more a matter of fear.
Scraps -- what you're describing is really not good. But I don't think it's nearly as common as teachers giving misinformation, or passing off their opinion as Torah, which is what usually happens when students stump them. I think the best answer would be, "I'm not sure. How do you think we can find the answer?"
So true.... one of my most confusing times was when one of my teachers told me that I am not allowed to question. It was a hard period for me.
We also have to realize that many times people who question (especially teens) are not always looking for an answer right now. Rather, they need the security of knowing that there are answers, when they are ready to hear them. Although they challenge to make a statement, one of the biggest mistakes is to dismiss the question.
scraps - yeah. teachers gotta realize that it's ok to say "i don't know."
swfm - thanks
david - you think you're getting away with that? speak up, man!
bas-melech - its a machlokes.
lol.
teens don't usually know. nor kids. and ome kids never grow up...
chaya - at the beginning of this year, i argued with my students over whether it's ok to question... it was os drilled into them that it was wrong, that they were vehemently against it! crazy...
its good to see that you are letting them question. but it can be scary too: what happens if next year, or in 5 years, their teachers aren't so open-minded? they can be cursed out for having questions. its scary.
When my sister moved to the east coast and started teaching in a frum school, she was shocked and upset at how easily the kids in her class took her word for fact.
In Cali, her kids - comprised mainly od students from non observant homes - challenged and questioned her constantly.
This bothers her, and she's been trying to rectify it slowly but surely...
D- at first I wasn't sure what you meant by "some kids don't know," then I thought maybe you were referring to my where to find the answer idea. Well, of course they don't know at first. The teacher should help them work it out and eventually they will become more resourceful and less lazy about using their minds. The standard "right answer" that I've seen is to tell the kid you don't know, but will write it down and get back to them. 1- most teachers forget at least 1/2 the time (i had ONE who never did). 2- it leaves the kid totally out of the process.
chaya - i made sure to tell them to ask their questions to the right people. and that when they come across someone who says they asked a foolish question, they should learn that that person in not a person to ask...
jewmaican - your sis and i should hook up... lol...
my students used to think they were "getting me" when we went off topic and had a discussion, until they realized that i scheduled those in... i told the teachers in the teachers' room that my favorite classes are when the girls are all yelling at me and at their friends... if it disturbs them it means they're thinking and not being complacent.
BM - (hey, if you can call me "D"...) for sure.. i agree with that 100%
Some of my best teachers in high school were the ones who encouraged us to think for ourselves. If we asked a question they couldn't answer, they would really research it and come back to us when they knew enough to give us a good answer, the kind of answer our questions deserved. I was totally shocked when I found out that there are schools where it was considered "trouble-making" to ask questions.
I think the biggest problem is that many (I'd even go so far as to say most) teachers these days don't know enough themselves to be able to field difficult questions. So of course they're threatened by questions, even well-thought-out and sincere ones, because it challenges them.
Bas~melech, I'd say that male teachers are more likely to take the approach you mentioned, of passing off their own knowledge as The Derech, while female teachers are more likely to simply label the questioner a troublemaker and try to ignore it.
scraps - i don't know if it's the bigggest problem, but it certainly is a problem...
and many of the women teachers i know pass off a LOT of opinion as fact... the male ones, actually, not as much...
Agree!!!
Scraps -- you could be right, I don't know about all that much more than my own experience, but I have found that my male teachers tend to know what they're talking about while some female ones don't and fake it. My male teachers have been much straighter -- if they know it, they say it, and if they don't then they tell you clearly what it is they know, what they don't know, what they maybe know, and whether they know where you might find the answer.
This is particularly a problem in halacha classses, where the male teachers I've had tend to know the background and details, while the female teachers just hold by whatever their fathers do and that's what they tell the little girls.
20 years - :)
basmelech - for sure!
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