Purim Date - Going Out

Here's part two!

(Dad goes to answer the door.)
Mom: Don't forget to hang up his coat.
(Dad opens door. Standing in the doorway is a tall, good looking, but kind of greenish stalk of celery.)
Dad: Sholom Aleichem, Mr. Celery. Come in.
(Dad takes coat and haphazardly hangs it in the closet)
Dad: Come, sit down. Do you want a drink?
Celery: Actually, a tissue would be nice. Coming in from the cold and all.
Dad: That's what I like. A man who shows his insides.
Celery: That's a nice screen you've got there. Kinda makes you look sort of glazed...
Dad: Well, I am tired. We have been waiting.
Celery: I'm really sorry. The shadchan gave me the wrong address. I actually knocked on the door to someone else's house. They thought I was a collector.
Dad: Well, now that you're here, we won't keep you waiting.
Mom: Dreamer, come down please.
(Dreamer quickly yet elegantly walks down the stairs)
Mom: This is Dreamer.
Dad: Ok, kids. Have a good time.
(He hands Celery his coat, while Dreamer scrambles to get hers out of the closet. Celery and Dreamer walk towards the car together.
Celery: Sorry I was late. The Shadchan gave me the wrong address. Boy, was that embarrassing!
Dreamer: You knocked on the wrong door?
Celery: Yeah. They thought I was a collector. They started dancing with me, and then gave me a nice check. Hey, at least this pays for the date!
Dreamer: That's a nice bonus.
(Celery opens the door to the car. Dreamer sits down. Celery closes the door, then scoots around the car to his side.)
Celery: (starting the car) So, why the tichel?
Dreamer: Well, you see, it's always been my dream to be married one day. It ain't been happening so fast, but I really think that this is the real me - married with a tichel on my head. So though my mom thought it wouldn't look right for a single girl to be wearing a tichel, I figured I'd let whoever my date was see what I really want in life.
Celery: Uuuummm... I would imagine that anyone dating you would know that you wanted to get married. Why else would you date?
Dreamer: Well, from the responses of the past few guys, it seems people DON'T know that. I wanted to make it nice and clear, right from the start.
Celery: Got it. So you want me to propose right now?
Dreamer: No! No! Wow, is that what it looks like? No, I don't even know you yet. As a matter of fact, why are YOU a celery today?
Celery: Well, you see, I could stand to lose a few pounds, but my inner self is quite thin, so that's one reason.
Dreamer: And...
Celery: And I love playing guitar.
Dreamer: And I like playing piano. What does that have to do with anything?
Celery: Well, the strings of the celery sorta remind me of the strings of my guitar.
Dreamer: Oh. Got it.
Celery: And I also wanted my future wife to realize that I've had enough veggies to last me a lifetime, so she shouldn't plan on making any once we get married.
Dreamer: Is that a proposal? (grins)
Celery: What? No. Just wanted to make things clear, just like you.
Dreamer: I really like this Purim date thing. I never got to know so much about someone only ten minutes into the date.
Celery: You did bring your license, right?
Dreamer: Actually, yeah. Why?
Celery: Well, it is Purim. I won't be able to drive soon. Check out the back seat.
(Dreamer peers into the back. Two large boxes of wine are resting on the seat.)
Dreamer: You really like performing Mitzvos to the fullest, don't you?
Celery: Especially this one. (grins) We're here.
(They walk out of the car and step into a beatiful hotel lobby.)
Celery: What do you like to drink?
Dreamer: I'm actually a water person, but I'm not sure about the filters in this place. So either it'll be bottled or a diet coke.
Celery: Comin' right up!
(He gets the drinks, and they sit in a quiet corner of the lobby.)
Dreamer: This is so much more fun than wearing a crazy suit for the first date. I mean, I knw you're supposed to look nice, but I always feel like I'm going to a wedding. Here, you get to see the true me right away.
Celery: I feel the same way. Except I'm normally not green.
(He takes out a bottle of wine, pours himself a cup, and starts drinking.)
Celery: Now, this is more like it. It's starting to feel like Purim.
Dreamer: So, what do you do in your leisure time?
Celery: Leisure time? Don't have much. I'm learning full time, though I do take a coffee break now and then. Gotta find out all the hock, you know. I play basketball on Friday afternoons. And I went to Camp Simcha for the past few summers, so I'll sometimes take my campers out for some fun. Or visit them in the hospital. What do you do?
Dreamer: Talk to my students. Read some books. Go on the computer. Go to a shiur or something.
Celery: That's leisure? Shiurim aren't exactly relaxing.
Dreamer: Yeah, well, you've never been at the ones I go too. When I'm there, I get the best sleep ever! Except for one. But that speaker's so entertaining, it's like watching a circus.
Celery: I see what you mean about the sleeping thing. I find it difficult to keep my eyes open during shiur sometimes as well. But I'm always thinking that maybe someone's checking me out in the bais medrash, so I better look like I'm paying attention.
Dreamer: Look like?
(Celery pours himself another glass of wine. Then another. And still another.)
(And another.)
Dreamer: So what do you really like doing?
Celery: Wha? Oh. Really? I like to eat. Cholent's my favorite. Ever been to Deli 52 on a Thursday night?
Dreamer: Nope. From the way my brothers describe it, I wouldn't want to. Besides, I don't like cholent.
Celery: Not like cholent? What's there not to like? Beans, barley, meat and potatoes. What more can a guy ask for?
Dreamer: A lot more. Anyway, if you haven't forgotten yet, I'm not a guy.
Celery: Right. Right. So nu, I'll make the cholent when we get married.
Dreamer: WHAT? Nobody's getting married yet!
Celery: I thought you said the tichel's a hint for marriage. Now that I know the true you, why go through the whole dating thing? I like you, so let's get married.
Dreamer: You forgot one part of the equation: I have to agree. And I don't know you well enough to say yes yet.
Celery: What's there to know? I'm a nice guy, intelligent, I'm learning, I make a good cholent - what more could you ask for?
Dreamer: I don't know. It's just... too fast.
Celery: What's wrong with fast?
Dreamer: I don't know. Give me the keys. I'll drive you home. I gotta think about this.
Celery: So we'll discuss it more when I pick up my car from your house tomorrow?
Dreamer: Yeah. I guess so. C'mon, let's go.
(Dreamer strolls to the car, while Celery stumbles along. He opens the back door, lays down across the back seat, and promptly falls asleep. Dreamer drives home, contemplating in solitude. She arrives at his house, blasts the music to wake him up, and says goodbye.)
Dreamer: (to herself) Gotta get used to this. Don't know if I like it so much.
(She pulls up in front of her home sweet home. The clown and computer are waiting at the window.)
Dad: Nu, so how was the date?
Mom: Where is he? Why are you driving? Why couldn't he be a mentch and drive you home?
Dreamer: Mom, it's Purim. He's drunk. He was being a mentch a letting me do the driving, so as to save our lives.
Dad: So, nu?
Dreamer: Well, he sorta.... proposed.
Mom: So, did you say yes?
Dreamer: Moooooooom... I told him we'l talk about it tomorrow.
Mom: You set up another date without the shadchan? How do you think you'll ever find a shidduch this way?
Dreamer: Mom, remember, I'm in middle of going out already. And he's got to come get his car.
Mom: Oh. So are you going to say yes?
Dreamer: Mom, I'll discuss it with you later. Oh, and Mom?
Mom: Yes, dear?
Dreamer: Your nose is falling off.